The year is 2030 and another decade has past, Scott and I are celebrating our 20th Wedding Anniversary and I am 67 years young. I am remembering a time when trying to obtain every other weekend visitation with Scott's youngest child Amanda, was an endurance race any thoroughbred horse would have had difficulty keeping up with.
My life as a
stepmother to many was easy. My life managing visitation for one child was nothing short of a terrific and tumultuous situation to work through. My heart still feels deep
love and gratitude for my relationship with Amanda and I am thankful for her in my life. During the quiet nights, my thoughts drift to her and I wonder if she will ever truly know or understand the great lengths to which her father went through to even have a chance to visit with her, know her and be a part of her life.
Amanda was moved several times away from her dad in an effort for her mom to reduce or eliminate visitation. This hurt Scott deeply, as his visits were given away and everything possible was done thwart his relationship with his daughter. Contentious texting wars and unkind remarks were immanent and anticipated bi weekly.
There were four separate court appearances and an annual year of college education money was paid to lawyers to keep the visitation awarded during the original divorce proceedings. A solid decade of arguing to gain simple visitation only to have it continually taken away with no regard for Scott's relationship with Amanda or Amanda's relationship with her Dad.
There were times I wanted to give up and walk away. LOOKING BACK, I ask myself, what did I learn from this decade of the lengthy and exhausting situation?
- I have learned to listen with my heart and react slowly.
- I have learned to love Amanda for the daughter of God she is.
- I have learned to respect Scott's enduring dedication towards his daughter.
- I have learned to have faith and believe in the end things will work out they way they are meant to.
- I have learned my opinions are not always wanted or needed.
- I have learned to calm my inner spirit and act with kindness and respect to all.
- I have learned to have love for those who may not love me in return.
- I have learned to trust in the God, as only he knows the path before us.
- I have learned my husband has passion for fatherhood.
- I have learned people can only do the best they can do with what they have learned.
- I have learned good people can act poorly in any given situation.
- I have learned to wholeheartedly work towards becoming the the woman Heavenly Father meant for me to be. A woman full of temperance, patience, forgiveness and an ability to love.
As I continue learning lessons, I can appreciate what the Lord has put in my path. He's helping me earn the right to return to him knowing I have done my best, given my all, trusted in him and loved with all my heart.
