Life is fragile and our Heavenly Father is the only one who knows what our beginning, middle and end will look like. We try to take control over our lives and shape it as we want. The perfect childhood, an amazing high school experience, the first kiss, our first love, the fun college life, a beautiful spouse, perfect children and happily ever after. While we are making our own changes, Heavenly Father is course correcting us for an even bigger plan than we'd want for ourselves. The people and personalities put in our path on purpose are there to help us grow and learn while experiencing all human emotions.
Duane Pearson was put in my husbands path nearly twenty years ago. They shared a tumultuous relationship in the early days, but it was the catalyst to a healthy friendship. In retrospect, they were both headstrong, alpha males with exactly the same passion for family, hunting, horses, farming, gardening, truck driving, guns, and camping, but somehow unable to see each other clearly. Patience, kindness and the love of all things similar prevailed with Duane and Scott. After becoming great friends they could spend hours in person, or on the phone talking about life.
I met Duane a short ten years ago during visits to each others homes, a few Fish Lake camping trips and through Scotts devoted and love for him.
Duane’s talent to love and serve everyone was the catalyst for Scott to follow in his footsteps. Duane served quick, loved with intensity and had a story to share with everyone.
In the fall of 2018, after hunting in the Book Cliffs, Duane was diagnosed with colon cancer. No one would have guessed Duane and Scotts last ride had already happened when the bad news arrived. Duane fought a battle he couldn't win, through chemo, medication, a feeding tube and an enormous amount of love from his friends and family.
We visited Duane at his home, he laid in his hospital bed surrounded by his wife Barbara, his children and grandchildren. The mood was light and Duane napped through the continuous chit chat. Duane's daughter Ella took charge of her fathers care and kept the home under control mostly to keep busy, but it was a load lifted from Barbara who was slowly losing her love and husband. Scott spoke about Duane's friendship and was brought to tears as the realization of loosing a magnificant friend was undeniably near at hand. Ella was compasionate towards Scott by offering him a box of tissues, which he openly needed and used. At that moment, I knew there was a change in my husband. Scott's heart was hurting deep inside for the friend he was about to lose and the mortality of human life slipping away.
As we were prepareing to leave Duane and his family, Duane woke from his slumber and spent the next twenty minutes telling us he had a gift for his friend Scotty. Ella was able to locate the gift and present it to Scott. Sometime during the last few months Duane and Scott spoke on the phone and Duane knew his Scotty wanted a certain kind of gun powder and couldn't find it in the stores. Duane, in his dying days was thinking of the needs of his friends and fulfilled those needs with little thought of himself.
Duane’s thoughtfulness and love has left an enormous impression on Scott’s heart. After the last visit with Duane, Scott has visibly been a different person, friend, husband, father and human being. On our drive home from Elmo to Erda, we talked about our bucket list for the rest of our lives and some of our hopes and dreams. A much needed conversation and finally, a break through for our relationship, love and eternity.
Through this experience, Scott made a change and is now visibly tender, kinder in word and deed, soft in voice and emotion. My heart has changed and is undeniably full. Our relationship is destined for greatness and will be better through our Heavenly Father and “His” vision for us.
